Slogging and sloshing forward and upward – one day at a time

So it’s 7 weeks today since the pumpkin-head operation. My recovery is going much slower than I’d hoped, but probably on par for what my BFD Edy said to expect. The pumpkin top is still numb, but most of the scabs from the incision are gone. And my hair is growing pretty good, except for the incision area which is like a fire-break line – just a few short hairs growing up in the middle of the scar line. At least when my hair gets long enough, that won’t really show!

Recovery’s been like the stock market, generally upwards but with lots of dips. I count the dips as stuff like:

• zoomer headaches that start at a 4 and go to a 6 or 7 in a few minutes
• not being able to sleep more than a couple of hours at a time
• not having much stamina with friends and guests – even though I so much want to spend time with them!
• that crazy neighbor downstairs who keeps banging the broom handle on the ceiling (the inside of my skull)

And I admit to a little minor depression every now and then when I feel like some things I’m gonna be stuck with, the sloshing and balance problems that keep my cane in my hand instead of on the coat rack (where it belongs, dang it!) along with the above list. But I’m really trying to keep a positive attitude, all it takes is reading or hearing about someone else’s someone else who also has/had a brain tumor – and it was bigger and/or malignant, and/or they had serious neurological problems and/or their lifespan is measured in months or days. Boy I was sure lucky compared to some other people! And I’m not gonna feel guilty about my luck either. I’m just sorry that not everyone has such amazing luck…

Ok, enough of that. The roller-coaster ride continues, and the dips are getting both shallower and fewer with more ok space in-between. It’s still a bit strange, but sometimes not so bad! Riding in the car is getting a little easier, I can turn my head and look out the side windows at stuff without feeling queasy anymore. Today we went to see my neurologist, and went over everything I’m feeling at this point in the recovery. He nodded sagely and said it’s mostly to be expected, and that it will continue to improve. By the end of the year (2014, c’mon down!) I should be nearly back to normal, although it may be spring before I can drive again. Double-drat!

A little cabin fever has set in, and so I’m looking for any opportunity to get out of the house. Walking the dog, going to the grocery store (with earplugs!), going out for coffee or tea or lunch or anything with anyone who’ll take me, heck-even the doctor’s visit was great! I’m trying to extend my stamina, but still am not a good judge of what I can handle – my friends/babysitters watch me and when they see my eyelids drooping, whisk me back home so I can take a nap. At least I can tuck myself into bed without help!

So this marathon continues, and I’ll keep slogging along, one day at a time. I don’t want to think too long-term these days, but expect the sloshing will probably continue for awhile. But I’ve got my sea legs now, so it really doesn’t bother me – too much. I keep the cane handy just for balance, and try to have something handy to grab onto nearby otherwise. But not a person or anything that might move! Just inanimate objects like walls, counters, stairway banisters and rails – even the handy streetlight pole. Oh, and I’ve restarted exercising – riding my shiny new stationary bike whilst watching TV – on that I’m sticking to light entertainment mostly. I’m up to an astounding 15 minutes without stopping – yay! And lastly, my super-hearing hasn’t gone away, so I’m wearing fashionable ear plugs a lot of the time now. Especially when I’m out and about or when visitors come. With them firmly inserted in my ear canal, I can still clearly hear people talking, but the loud noises (Astro, stop barking!) and high-frequencies that are a bit painful are mostly dulled.

Well, enough about me, how are you doing? Let’s chat in the comments below, ok?

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